Advice on Life & Love from Cicciolina: Italian Porn Star, Parliamentarian, and Cultural Icon
“I would eliminate all the prudes in the world.”
Hi everyone! Back to you with some exciting news: I’m launching a new column in Elephant Magazine called Figure Study, where I’ll be interviewing artists on the intersection of eroticism and creativity. Our first edition is an interview on life and love with the Italian artist and cultural icon Cicciolina: Porn star, parliamentarian, singer, spy for the secret service, and so much more.
The column is co-published with Pleasure-Seeking, so you can expect a new one in your inbox every month. Enjoy!
You don’t often hear the words “porn star” and “parliamentarian” in the same breath—let alone referring to the same person. But Ilona Anna Staller, better known as Cicciolina, has never conformed to ordinary categories. Throughout her kaleidoscopic life, she’s been a singer, erotic radio host, actress, visual artist, international muse, and perhaps most famously, a member of the Italian Parliament—the first to be elected after starring in adult films.
Born in Budapest, she began modelling as a teenager and waiting tables at the Danube Continental Hotel, where she was recruited by Hungary’s secret service to spy on American businessmen. She took on the stage name Cicciolina in the 1970s, when she rose to prominence as a radio host dispensing advice on matters of the heart—and loins—on a late-night show titled “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?”
In the 1980s, she became a pop-cultural force, blending the spirit of ’60s free love with the flair of a natural provocateur. With a cascade of platinum curls and flowers in her hair, she attended protests topless and appeared on TV in the nude, simultaneously campaigning for justice and pushing the boundaries of what it meant to be a woman in the public eye. Beloved across Italy, she embodied a new kind of sexual liberation: earnest, political, and joyfully transgressive.
Cicciolina’s parliamentary proposals were as provocative as her performances: she advocated for LGBTQ+ rights, environmental protections, a guaranteed minimum wage, and the reopening of state-run brothels. In her creative life, she has described herself as “a 360-degree artist”: her legacy spans more than fifty pop songs, countless performances, dozens of erotic films, her personal painting practice, and an infamous collaboration with her then-husband, American artist Jeff Koons, whose large-format pornographic portraits of the couple still spark debate in galleries worldwide. But in Cicciolina’s eyes, her greatest masterpiece is her son Ludwig, born of that marriage.
At 72, Cicciolina remains a symbol of feminine power, creativity, and defiant eroticism. In this conversation, she shares advice on love, pleasure, and politics—from the difference between good and great sex, to how desire changes over time, and why she still believes in a world full of flowers.
You’ve had a fascinating career—from porn star to parliamentarian and beyond. What parts of you have changed through these transformations, and which have stayed the same?
As you know, I was a member of the Italian Parliament from 1987 to 1992—five years—and I’m proud of that, because I learned what it means to be inside politics. I consider myself an excellent parliamentarian. I made nineteen legislative proposals that are still relevant today and have been filed with the Italian Parliament. I’m proud of myself because I was not a corrupt deputy. I hate corruption, and I hope many follow that example.
I was, for a short time, a famous porn diva. I made about twenty films that are now iconic or cult. Today, of course, I’m no longer a porn diva—things change, life brings transformation. Now I do a thousand things: I paint, I’ve recorded 50 songs sung in English, French, Spanish… I do reality shows for global TV and guest appearances on talk shows.
How has your relationship with desire and pleasure evolved over the course of your life?
Desire doesn’t change with age. In fact, sexuality with the right partner becomes even more exciting and beautiful. The point, though, is finding the right partner. Currently, I’m single and I’m searching for the eternal Love of my life. Who knows, maybe my wish will come true between 2025 and 2026.
Sexuality is still very important to me—I feel like a teenager when I have sex.
What, in your opinion, is the difference between good sex and great sex?
First of all, there’s a saying that a 16-centimetre erect penis is ideal for a woman. In my opinion, the best sex includes lots of foreplay and trying all the positions from the Kama Sutra. What matters most is that the man finds the G-spot.
What challenges did you face in expressing your sexuality in the public eye? How do you think attitudes toward sexual expression have shifted for the better and what would you still like to see?
Sexuality has certainly changed in society, because now we have platforms like YouPorn, Pornhub, OnlyFans… There’s more permissiveness, and everything is more normalised. Back then, almost everything was forbidden—I got reported many times when I performed erotic-soft porn shows in clubs. I was constantly being reported. Today, with all these platforms, it’s almost all considered normal.
If you could change one thing about how society views sexuality, what would it be?
I would eliminate all the prudes in the world.
Some people avoid scandals, others embrace them. How do you feel about scandals?
I don’t live for or love scandals. It’s not that I disagree with people who do certain things—it’s just not in my nature to create scandals.
How have your romantic relationships shaped your life and sense of identity, and what role have friendships played?
I’ve always tried to have male friends too, but unfortunately, men think with their penis, and it’s hard to reason with them. They always want to take me to bed, thinking I’m a sex-hungry woman, but I’m not. I love making sweet love, having fantastic sex. I imagine myself on a heart-shaped pink bed covered in rose petals and oriental perfumes, making love to the ideal man.
If you could give your younger self a piece of advice about love, what would it be?
Fall in love with the right person—someone who is sweet in love, tender in sex, and very generous.
What trait do you most admire in others? And what trait do you admire most in yourself?
Sweetness… I hate arrogance and aggression. At heart, I’m a fundamentally sweet woman. I was born under the Sagittarius sign, uninhibited and a bit naughty.
How would you explain the connection between your passion for politics, your interest in adult entertainment, and art? Do you see these as separate aspects of your identity, or is there a common thread?
Entertainment is a world of its own, and if you want to do erotic videos, films, or shows, you really need to like erotica—otherwise, it shows on your face. Politics has nothing to do with pornography, even though many politicians like sex… like everyone!
You’re born with art in your veins. I consider myself a 360-degree artist, like a diamond with many facets.
Do you believe our lives are guided by destiny or that we shape our own path? If destiny exists, what part of your life feels written in the stars?
From the moment we’re born, our destiny is already written in the stars. We can try to change it during our lives, but even when I’ve tried with all my energy to change some parts of my life, I’ve realised that destiny redirected it all in the end.
Tell me about a decision that changed your life—a moment when you were at a crossroads, and had to choose which direction to proceed. What were your thoughts and feelings, and why did you choose what you chose?
I’ve had to make two or three very difficult decisions in my life. One of the hardest was divorcing my ex-husband, Jeff Koons, the great American contemporary artist, with whom I had a beautiful son, Ludwig Koons. When I left New York with baby Ludwig, I was still in love with him. I had to make a drastic decision and ask for a divorce, even though my feelings were still very strong. I often think back and wonder if that decision was too bold…
You’ve said that dreams are an important part of your life. Can you share a vivid dream and what you think it means? Are there recurring themes in your dreams?
I dream in colour. I love dreaming in my soft bed with a mirror on the ceiling. Every morning when I wake up, I look at myself and ask, How beautiful am I today? Like in fairy tales: Mirror, mirror on the wall… My recurring dreams often show me swimming in crystal-clear sea waters among large, blue fish.
Is there a story from your life that’s so incredible it almost feels like a dream?
Absolutely. I’ve lived an extraordinary life, one that most people couldn’t even dream of having. Sometimes I look back at all those strange, different, unimaginable periods full of surprises.
I’m happy to share my new photographic-biographical book titled Memorie, and I hope to find a film producer for the story of my life.
If your younger self could see your life today, what do you think she would say? And what excites you most about the future?
Right now, we’re living through a very difficult political time worldwide, and I’m definitely in favour of peace between peoples and against absurd wars. There are some politicians I’d throw into the sea. The future… it’s hard to predict what will happen.
But for sure, I want a world full of little flowers—a world where people smile and are happy, where there’s work for everyone, and where there isn’t such a huge social divide between rich and poor.
Looking back, was there ever a moment you felt completely free? What made you feel that way?
Mentally, I still feel very free. I love the era of the flower children in the 1960s—back then, I hadn’t yet arrived in Italy, and I was still very young.
If you could invite five people, living or dead, to dinner, who would they be? What would you talk about?
My political idol was Mahatma Gandhi. Then Marco Pannella, Michelangelo Buonarroti, Roman Polanski, and Ennio Morricone—he wrote the score for my film, dedicated to the Aegean Sea.
What’s one question you wish people would ask you?
Are you happy? My answer is yes, because I live life my way.
You can buy Cicciolina’s new book, Memorie, here.
sexless zoomer puriteens should read this
Cicciolina 4ever 🙌🙌🙌💗